I do quite a bit of work with anti-trafficking efforts in Chicago & I am starting to get involved in domestic abuse efforts, mainly spreading the world and donation collections. In these efforts, you hear about the women and children being trafficked or abused and you hear about the men who victimize them. You hear about husbands/boyfriends beating their wives/girlfriends, you hear about men forcing women in 3rd world countries into brothels.
I just heard about the Unbreakable Project. They collect photos of sexual assault victims holding a sign with the last thing their attacker said to them. If you click this link here, this is a series of 26 male sexual assault victims.
Both men and women have problems coming forward after being assaulted. Women are blamed or told they deserve it by the way they dress or how much they drank. However, in society, women can at least be accepted as victims, it is still incredibly hard for them though and I am not trying to lessen that, because I know it can be difficult.
For men though, a man should be able to defend themselves. I mean, how could a big strong man be raped? Of course, only weak men get raped or small men, maybe young boys? We also all know, because it is common sense of course, that a woman could never rape a man or abuse him physically! WRONG! Men can be raped by men or women, age and size have nothing to do with it. If a man is raped, that does NOT make him any less of man or mean something is wrong with him. These are such common misconceptions, even in the list above the men hold up signs saying “‘Men can’t be raped’ when I told someone” and one man was asked “How can a girl rape a boy?” and later told to “man up” by his fiance when had a panic attack after seeing his rapist 8 years later.
Whether the victim is a male or female it is NOT OUR RIGHTto judge them, tell them they’re lying, blame them for what happened. We should be embracing them with love and understanding, we should help them in whatever way they need help.
I have had a male family member physically abused by a woman, a woman smaller than him & I have someone in my life, incredibly close to me who has been sexually assaulted. Right now, my role in support is just being there, having fun, going out and letting him know that he is not less of a man and I will never think that about him. I let him know that whenever he wants to talk I am here for him and I offer a safe place and will only show him love not judgement and that is how both men and women should be treated.
Maybe after reading this, after seeing the photos, you might have to change your perspective, hopefully in a positive way, to be accepting and understanding.
Always remember not to judge, just accept with love.